Jae Windley, MA

 

Jae Windley, MA

PRONOUNS: he/him


Relationship and Sex Therapist

SPECIALTIES:

  • Men's Sexual Health

  • Mismatched Desire

  • LGBTQIA+ Relationships

  • Modern Dating

  • Religious Trauma and Sex

  • POC-Affirming Therapy

  • General Couples Therapy

  • Couples Communication

RATE:

$150 / session

 

I believe pleasure is a human right—not a luxury or something to "earn." Let's reconnect you with that truth.

You're tired of sex feeling like a performance you're failing at. Maybe you've lost interest entirely, or you're going through the motions, hoping desire will magically return. Perhaps you're navigating questions about your sexuality, struggling with erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation, or wondering why intimacy feels so disconnected from the spiritual or emotional connection you crave. If shame has become your constant companion around sex, dating, or your own identity, you've found the right person.

I'm Jae, and I specialize in helping individuals and couples reclaim their sexual stories. My work focuses on the complex intersections of identity, spirituality, and sexuality—particularly for men's sexual health, LGBTQIA+ relationships, and anyone healing from religious trauma. As a Black queer therapist who grew up navigating multiple identities in Florida, I understand how exhausting it can be when the world asks you to compartmentalize parts of yourself that are meant to be whole.

Many of my clients come to me feeling disconnected from their bodies, their desires, or their sense of sexual self-worth. You might be dealing with performance anxiety that's taken over your sex life, struggling with mismatched desire in your relationship, or questioning everything you thought you knew about your sexuality. Maybe you grew up learning that good people don't want sex, or that your desires are somehow wrong or dirty. Perhaps you're a man who's been told to "man up" while secretly struggling with intimacy issues, or someone whose faith and sexuality feel impossibly at odds.

I create space for all of it—the awkward questions, the shame-filled confessions, the fears you've never said out loud. We'll explore what turns you on (physically, emotionally, spiritually), examine the messages you've internalized about pleasure and desire, and work to rebuild your relationship with your sexual self. 

My approach blends evidence-based techniques with laughter and deep compassion for the human experience. I draw from narrative therapy to help you rewrite limiting sexual scripts, person-centered therapy to honor your authentic self, and mindfulness practices to reconnect you with your body's wisdom. My style is direct but warm—I'll give you the real talk when you need it, always from a place of genuine care. My approach is particularly affirming for people of color who may feel marginalized in traditional therapy spaces.

I earned my Master's in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from The Chicago School of Professional Psychology, where I specialized in trauma-informed, LGBTQIA+-affirming, and sex-positive therapeutic approaches. My work is rooted in the belief that healing happens when we can embrace every part of ourselves—including the messy, complicated, and beautifully human aspects of our sexuality.

When I'm not in session, you'll find me doing improv theater, diving deep into astrology with friends, or searching for Chicago's best nachos. I believe that pleasure and joy aren't just goals for therapy—they're essential parts of the healing process itself.

 
 
 
 
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Chenoah Hassan, LSW

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Tori Kontor, ALMFT